Anniversary

As the new year started, so did a new chapter in our lives. This is the fifth year that Rhys and I are together as a couple and what a gorgeous time it has been.

When viewed through my eyes, the world has changed in these past four years. So much so, that I can’t seem to remember what it was like before I met Rhys. Every moment of this time is so special that I would not change it for the world. We have both grown up over the years into different people than the ones who started dating all those years ago. And time only brought us closer together, entwining our lives and times into this beautiful pattern that our lives have become.

The better part of last year, we had to spend apart. And no amount of texts or calls would fill the gap that the thousand miles created. So it was with great difficulty that we planned to be together for a weekend and celebrate our anniversary. And that is what we did.

One freezing Friday morning, I landed in Chicago and into melted into Rhys arms. And my first taste of America ? A chocolate fudge cake he had baked for me. Nothing could have made our reunion sweeter. And thus began our weekend in Chicago.

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Dealing with homesickness and much more….

Hello pretty people

I know it’s been so long since I wrote on our blog. Was occupied with travelling, studies. and application work for residency. And I had to come back to USA for research work at a university hospital in Kentucky (Life of a doctor, I tell you ! ). Finally I am back in US, and well-settled temporarily (or at least, that’s how I assure myself and everyone). Coming to States for the second time all alone was exciting for me initially, but this feeling vanished just few days after I landed here.

It will be a month in USA for me next week. I am glad that I managed through the last 3 weeks without getting home sick for even a single day ( Believe me, its a HUGE achievement for a guy like me). Somehow I have been keeping myself busy with work, setting up the new place, exploring the city (sadly, this small city has nothing much to explore), occasional running sessions, and most important, cooking. Now only work and cooking seem to keep me occupied..

For some unknown reasons, I have been feeling homesick since past 2-3 days. I told you I haven’t been as homesick as I was during my last visit to USA. When I came here 3 weeks back, my research mentor told me that I will get homesick the most in the 3rd or 4th week of my stay here. And it is coming true. That’s so Freaking  !! I wish these weeks of peak homesickness pass away soon.

I have been in constant touch with my boyfriend Nick who is back in my home country, dealing with similar problems, not of homesickness, but of being alone. He has changed his daily routine and biological clock according to my local time (i.e., EST). Isn’t he such a sweet heart to do this. I miss him terribly here. May be living alone has its perks (as everyone says), but not for me. For me, living alone away from my boyfriend, family and friends is tough, and it is tough for Nick also.  I have mentioned all this in last posts as well, but I am proud of myself (and surprised also !!! ) for the fact that I am dealing with all these changes in a more mature way this time, and so is Nick. Talking over phone and Skype, or texting with each other is so comforting for both of us. I always wait for that beep on my phone for Nick’s text.

I am a very social guy, and have always surrounded by people, be it home or work. May be that’s why I am feeling lonely. Hopefully, I will get hold of things soon and not have such feelings. But I can’t say anything for sure.

For now, I have to go for a running session, because soon the weather is going to be pretty harsh, and make it difficult to even walk here.

Miss you Nick !!

Love

Rhys

Long Distance is tough

Stating the obvious. Long distance is tough. Like really really tough. Barely a month in and I already miss Rhys with a visceral longing I did not even know I could feel. How will I get through the remaining five months?

It is not that I am lonely. It is just that even with company, I feel incomplete. These past few years have had their good time and bad. But through all of it Rhys has been by my side. And now I seem to have forgotten how to be by myself. This past weekend some friends of mine took me to a party ( coz I have been staying cooped up in my room.) It was a lovely venue and ordinarily I would have enjoyed myself, but it just felt weird to be by myself. I felt like an odd bundle of elbows and knees. It just doesn’t feel right to dance with anyone else anymore ( I honestly never thought I would turn down a dance but I guess I was wrong )

Where is my baby ? I can’t dance without him …..

Meanwhile my friends think I am being Mr. Snooty for avoiding them and my family is scared I will get sick from staying in my room day after day. But I see no point in going out because it ends up with me sulking and missing Rhys and offending whichever unlucky soul happens to be with me at the time. So it is youtube binge watching vlogs and a jar of cookies day after day.

Gosh ! I really need to stop feeling sorry for myself. About time I pull myself together.

Maybe tomorrow. Right now I still have my hand in the cookie jar. A few more vlogs to watch. I think I will watch other happy gay couples till I fall asleep.

  • Nick

P.S.- Meanwhile my baby just messages and he is getting Fro-Yo! Oddly enough, I am more excited by this than I have been all week!

A

It’s My Birthday

Well okay if you wanna get technical , its not my birthday YET ! But I am soooo excited. The first birthday in ages when I won’t have to worry about exams and studies and hospitals and all. So super psyched !

Also, this is the last few days I get to spend with Rhys before I leave for a vacation and he leaves for his new job in the US. Have mixed feelings about that – though I am super super super proud of my baby for getting this job, I know I’ll miss him A LOT. The last time he was away for three months, it was torture. For the both of us. But I guess we’ll get through it.

Right now though, I won’t dwell on that.. Right now is party time. I know Rhys has an amazing two days planned and I can’t wait to get started !

Yay !

It’s ( almost ) my birthday !

-Nick

A Day Not according to Plan……

Exam are over…… finally…….. after months of grueling study and being away from Rhys ( he prefers to study at home) we are finally free.  Of course we just couldn’t keep off each other for long.

Sometime later, as I lay in his arms Rhys gets a call from his friend P calling him away. Though Rhys had invited me to have lunch with him and P later in the afternoon, he goes off alone at the moment promising to call me when they set off. And true to his word, he calls me. Though I wasn’t really sure about going, I wasn’t going to let a little uneasiness get in the way of spending time with my love, was I now?  So I get dressed and head out to join Rhys and his friends. A nice little evening seemed in the cards.

Oh Man! Could I have been more wrong?! As I approach them, I distinctly hear P say, “Oh great! Here come He!” with what seemed like a nice dollop of  sarcasm to me. But then Rhys didn’t make any comment so I gave her the benefit of doubt and thought I must have imagined it. Putting that out of my mind, I wave to them and in reply get a ” Just about anyone seems to be adding up to this outing” from another friend of his. And Rhys still doesn’t say a word……. Luckily just then I got a call and manage to step away without retaliating and creating a scene. And I return to my room burning with indignation. Just then Rhys calls me and asks me where I had disappeared, as if nothing had happened. I make up an excuse and convince him to go ahead without me. So there I am left alone in my hostel at the end of my exams.

Later in the evening, Rhys calls me to ask me if I would like to join them for a movie. And since by now I am seriously missing his company, I decide to put aside my pride and say yes. Just then P screams into the phone, “Not Nick! He’s not coming here for sure! “. Well that was that. I just tell Rhys I am definitely not coming now. He is of course free to go ahead with his plans. And he does.

So I am left wondering…..Am I over reacting ? Should I have just meekly submitted to the insult as it came from Rhys’s dearest friend? Or should I have given her a piece of my mind?

But what I just can’t seem to understand is Rhys’s mute behavior over this whole time. Is it possible that he never noticed how I was being insulted by his friends? Or does it not concern him at all?  Why did he not try to defend me or at least make me feel less awkward? (For apart from being my boyfriend, he also happened to be the one to invite me.)

Too many questions for my seething mind right now……. Does anyone have any answers????